From last week…
I thought I had caught a ‘big fish’ when the lady was staring and smiling towards my direction, but I was mistaken.
It turned out to be another hoax, another fantasy which would not see the light of the day after my stay on campus.
Talking about the babe, she was spotting a pink round neck polo t-shirt (with her cleavages looking like they would drop from their positions any moment) on a short skirt which left little to the imagination, and a pair of pink sneakers to match her top.
Like one who had been cursed, my eyes could not leave her ‘frontal columns’ as I kept staring at the inscription on her top: “look… don’t touch!” and thought within me “why would a lady come up with such an atrocious outfit when she was sure that guys would be ever willing to keep staring?”
“Perhaps, that was one of the things one must meet here.”
The smile would later fade away as soon as it came as it turned out to be one which suggested that I had been caught up in a serious mess with my late arrival and registration.
No sooner had I entered the classroom than I heard that registration would be ending that week (it was a Tuesday) and that anyone who failed to complete his before the stipulated time would have to forfeit his provisional admission.
At that moment, I was already sweating despite the fact that we were the privileged few to have air conditioners in our classroom. I felt like defecating, I was cold, my heart began to beat really fast, my head started aching me, I was really confused and did not know how to rescue the situation.
Immediately, I remembered that I had yet to meet with the course adviser, so I stepped out of the classroom and headed straight to her office. I turned back, however, to stare at the lady, only for me to see her wearing a smirk on her face.
Front view of the entrance to the Yaba College of Technology (YABATECH)
“Jeeez, she must have seen me look really disturbed,” I whined.
When I got to the course adviser’s office, the place had been locked up!
At that moment, I felt the shit strolling down my bowels, looking like they might drop any moment.
Many thoughts started coming up, almost at the same time. “What do I do now, since the HOD has asked me to meet her to finish up with the screening? What will I say I achieved today? How will I face my parents and siblings when I get home? But where in the name of God has this woman gone to?”
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While I was still in my own world, the lady I met in class earlier just walked up to me and without wasting much time, said in pidgin: “O boy, e be like say you no sabi say clearance no be beans, abi?” meaning (you seem to be unaware of how tedious clearance could be).
Before adding: “I’d suggest that you wait for her here until she arrives.
“Anyway, I am Bisi,” as she stretched her slim, silky hand forward, “and you seem to be very new to the system here.”
Without hesitating, I accepted the handshake with utmost gratitude, while also replying, “I am Ben, nice meeting you.”
If not for my disbelief in the fact that ladies could seduce men with charms, I would have concluded that the lady took my hands with some kind of voodoo.
This was because the moment I shook hands with her, all my worries disappeared! It felt like I had met with Jesus, the peaceful man, and everything I was thinking within me vanished as my eyes (God have mercy on me) fell on her chest.
The newly-built administrative building of the Yaba College of Technology, Lagos
“Chai! This girl will destroy somebody today,” I mused to myself while I was at it.
She noticed that I liked the inscriptions and gave me a very lewd smile. I didn’t know whether to reply with same having experienced her initial coldness stemming from the first smile I got from her.
Feeling rather embarrassed, I quickly looked away and said: “I just hope the woman returns today so that I can quickly finish up with this registration, I cannot afford not to do the clearance and other stuff today.
“Thanks a lot, Bisi. You have really been of great help in the last few minutes.”
She simply smiled and turned to leave, and apparently noticing that I might be staring at her rare side, she wiggled her hips even more, as she descended the stairs.
“Omo, na which kain life be this now? Person never do registration, dis girl wan finish me with all these things. Kai! Na die I dey so,” I said to myself in pidgin.
While I was sitting down in front of the course adviser’s office, I suddenly started dosing and soon slept off.
And while I was at it, I had a very serious dream. Bisi suddenly appeared in my dream and what happened afterwards is a story for another day.
To be continued next week…
PS: Note that this is a combination of reality and fiction; the writer’s experience and a little bit of fiction, based on the writer’s imaginations.
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